Lately #006: Daily Dad, Logging Off, and Looking Up

The last couple of months have been a nice reminder that life doesn't always have to be forward momentum.

I’ve spent a good chunk of time thinking about what’s next for me professionally, and I’ve got more to share soon. But for now, I've been so thoroughly enjoying the unexpected gift of having some undivided time with my kids.

It’s funny what happens when your brain gets permission to stop living in a constant state of urgency. On one hand, the deceleration was an adjustment. But on the other, there’s been a beautiful quietness I wasn’t expecting.

I don’t think I realized how much mental weight I was carrying on a daily basis. And while I'm excited for what's coming next, this slower season has been really good for me and my family, and I'm trying not to wish it away. It's reminded me that some things aren't worth building if it means sacrificing little moments you can't get back.

Which is my long-rambling way of saying: I'm a bit late on this edition of Lately. But it's here nonetheless. :)

ICYMI — Lately #005: Decision Makers, a Smarter Siri, and Resetting My Software Stack »

Reading: Daily Dad and a five-year journal

One of my goals this year has been becoming a more intentional parent by spending less time looking at screens and more time being present with my kids.

Around the new year, I picked up Ryan Holiday's five-year companion journal to accompany Daily Dad. I'd been reading bits of the book itself here and there previously, but failed to really stick with it all of last year and thought the journal would be a good forcing function to keep me honest.

Each day starts with a short reading and a prompt that nudges you toward thinking about the kind of parent you’re becoming. Some prompts are introspective, while others ask about your kids directly. What are they interested in right now? What values are you teaching? What could you and your kids get into together?

The journal itself will be fun to revisit years from now, but I think what I've appreciated most so far is that it gently forces me to notice things I'd otherwise potentially forget. It’s teaching me to notice who I’m becoming as a dad while also paying attention to who they’re becoming.

Watching: The Vergecast on logging off

Back in Lately #004, I wrote about trying an app called Jomo to put a “speed bump on scrolling.” So far, it’s worked. I've reduced my screen time pretty dramatically, and have built what (I think) is a healthier relationship with my phone and social media overall.

A recent episode of The Vergecast happened to land right in the middle of that experiment. The crew spent an episode talking about how they intentionally disconnect — everything from vacation habits and notification management to carrying a real camera instead of relying on a phone, and intentionally adding friction back into technology.

“Friction as a feature” is what I’ve found works best for me, and it was interesting hearing how other people have embraced the same philosophy in different ways.

For years, we’ve optimized every app and device to remove friction from our lives. But in doing so, we’ve also removed many of the little moments that would’ve made us stop and ask whether we actually wanted to open that app in the first place.

What I’m finding is that sometimes a tiny speed bump is more than enough.

Using: Typeless

I'm hardly the first person to talk about AI dictation apps. Wispr Flow seems to be great, and I’ve been hearing good things about Willow, too. Lately, though, I've been using Typeless.

The biggest thing I appreciate isn’t necessarily the accuracy (though it’s excellent). It’s how forgiving it is.

Typeless recently released version 2.0, which added live editing while you’re dictating. If I need to spell something mid-sentence, correct myself halfway through a thought, or completely change direction while I’m talking, it keeps up surprisingly well. It also learns my writing style over time and lets me build a custom dictionary, which makes it feel more like the tool is adapting to me than the other way around.

As a chronic rambler, and someone who is constantly bouncing between emails, Slack, notes, and Todoist, it’s become a nice way to respond without stopping everything else I’m doing.

Wild Card: Looking up

One of my favorite Daily Dad readings recently told the story of Arthur Ashe.

As a kid, someone casually asked him if he’d like to learn how to play tennis. Looking back years later, Ashe wrote, “As casually as that, my life transformed.”

In sharing this story, though, Ryan Holiday’s point wasn’t really about tennis. It was about paying attention to those "little flickers of curiosity" before they disappear.

Lately, my daughter’s curiosity has been pointing toward the sky.

A wild and colorful Indiana sunset taken from our driveway in early July.

She’s become fascinated with astronomy — the moon, the stars, beautiful Indiana sunsets, and trips to the local planetarium. So the other night we picked up a cheap telescope, grabbed some snacks, stayed up way past bedtime, and spent an evening in the driveway looking at the night sky.

She found the Big Dipper almost immediately. We also spotted Venus, which was cool. But the most fun part was that she just never stopped asking questions (which won't surprise anyone that knows my daughter).

"What's that one?"

"Why is that one brighter?"

"Can we see Saturn?"

The telescope isn’t anything fancy — about $60 on Amazon. Truthfully, you could probably say it sucks. But she didn't notice. If Ashe was right, that’s not really the point. Sometimes all it takes is someone asking, “Want to learn how to play?”

Or, in our case, "Want to stay up late and do some stargazing?"

Now I’m fully down the rabbit hole, too. I’ve downloaded Sky Guide, started reading about beginner telescopes, and have a feeling this is going to become something of a summer tradition. If you’ve gone down this path before — astronomy resources, telescope recommendations, or fun ways to keep a kid excited about space — send 'em my way.

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That's Lately #006! If you’ve got an astronomy app I should download, a telescope recommendation, or something you’ve been into lately, come say hi in the comments or shoot me a note at hello@joetacosik.com or on LinkedIn.

Talk soon!